Places to Go, People to Find
by kama-kun
Summary: Sora, Donald and Goofy travel around in their new souped up gummi ship to find Leon and Yuffie, who are being weird. NOT ONE, NOT TWO, BUT THREE OCS! there is a contest, enter if you wish. : Rated T for safety.
1. Chapter 1

**Disc: Eh, the very first chapter of my very first fanfic in EVER. I'm ecstatic. Ok? Please R&R. Thanks. I don't own Kingdom Hearts.**

- - -

The young girl's eyes slowly fluttered open. She sat up in her bed, stretching and yawning. A brief glance around her room found a paopu fruit laying in a sunbeam from her open window. She sighed. "Where is he? He promised he'd come back for me…ohhh…" She felt a sharp pain in her heart…

"YOW! Watch where you're pointing that!" Sora clutched his chest. "You don't have to stick your freaking staff near my heart! Kairi's probably hurt now too!" The duck crossed his arms and stared at Sora.

"Sheesh, it's always 'Kairi this', or 'Kairi that' with you! Why don't we just fly the gummi ship back to your islands so you can be with your precious Kairi! Besides, it was an accident!"

"No it wasn't!"

"Yes it was!"

"Please stop fighting. Your dinner is going to get cold." Sora and Donald both turned around to find a girl with pointy ears, and a pink dress and boots on.

"All right Aerith," said Sora. "We'll come. Hey, by the way, where's…"

Sora's sentence was cut short by a tall dog-like animal with a weird hat on crashing through the dining room doors screaming, "DINNERTIME! DINNERTIME! UH HYUCK."

"Hello Goofy." Said Aerith.

"Sit down, quit the chit-chat, and let's eat! I'm starving!" yelled Yuffie.

"Sheesh, pipe down." Said Donald.

"What'd you say?" Yuffie readied a ninja star.

"I SAID PIPE DOWN!"

"Stop fighting!" Squall/Leon had tears streaming down his face. He then covered it and dashed out of the room in sobs. Yuffie quickly followed.

"What's with him?" Sora asked when they had left. "And Yuffie, too."

"Yeah, Leon would never shed tears in front of anyone." Said Goofy.

"And I've never seen Yuffie raise a hand to anyone but her opponents before." Said Donald.

"Yuffie? And what about you Donald?" said Aerith. "You got pretty hot under the collar yourself."

"He's always like that." Scoffed Sora.

"HEYYYYYY!" yelled Donald. "If you noticed, I didn't draw my staff!"

Aerith nodded. "That's true. But we really should investigate Leon and Yuffie's strange behavior."

"Yeah!" exclaimed Sora.

"Hold on!" Goofy placed his arm in front of Sora, who was about to bound out the door. "Before we start to figure this out, we might need some reincoursements! Uh hyuck!"

Aerith giggled. "Goofy, I think you mean 'reinforcements'."

"Yeah, those! Ooh hoo hoo hoo hoo!" Goofy chortled. "We might need 'em 'cause, uh, the 'you know whats' might be behind this…"

Donald rolled his eyes impatiently. "Aw, shucks, why don't you just say that the HEARTLESS might be behind it?" Goofy screamed stupidly and clutched his heart in terror.

"Eh, don't worry!" Sora drew the Keyblade and swung it around. "We did it once and we'll do it again! If the Heartless _are _behind this…"

Aerith grinned. "That's the spirit!"

"Alrighty then, let's go team! Off to find reinforcements!" Sora screamed.

"Uh, maybe we should start by goin' to see Leon and Yuffie right here in the castle." Said Goofy.

"WHAAAAAT? You were the one who said that we should………"

"Um, Sora," said Donald quietly. He pointed to Goofy and made the motions with his hands of a brain falling out. Sora turned back to Goofy.

"Uh, yeah, that too." Sora followed Donald, Goofy, and Aerith out the dining room door.

- - -

**Well, that chapter wasn't so great. I'll try to put more funny and action into it.**

_--kama-kun_


	2. Chapter 2

Disc-Okay, at the time that I am writing this, only Jenna-san and happykid have reviewed. Eh. Oh well, here comes me! I don't own Kingdom Hearts. Also, I do not own BBC, Tempur-Pedic mattresses, Hilton Hotels, or The Real World.

"Leon! Yuffie! Where are you?"

The four had reached the Rising Falls before the castle gates.

"We've searched everywhere!" Sora griped. "I'm tired!"

"Aw, quit whining!" Donald backfired.

"Yeah, Sora!" Goofy joined in. "They could be anywhere."

Suddenly, Sora stopped and looked down at the ground.

"Sora, what's wrong?" Aerith asked. Sora pointed down at the ground. There lied a gummi block.

"WHAT! How'd that get here?" Donald shouted.

"I don't know," Sora said. "But we sure didn't put it here." Goofy gulped.

"Gawrsh, ya think Leon an' Yuffie escaped on a gummi ship?"

"Looks that way," Sora said.

"Where do you think they went?' Aerith asked fearfully.

"I dunno," said Sora. "But we're about to find out! Come on guys! To the gummi garage!"

"Hold on!" Aerith stopped Sora with her arm. "Before you leave, I have a gift for you."

"A GIFT!" Sora, Donald, and Goofy exclaimed.

"Maybe it's a new Keychain!" Sora said.

"Nah, maybe a new staff for me!" Donald said.

"It's probably cheesecake for me!" Goofy screamed.

Sora and Donald turned around. "CHEESECAKE!"

Aerith giggled. "Sorry, but it's not a Keychain, a staff…" she paused and gave Goofy a weird look. "Or cheesecake. Here, let me show you."

"Wow!" exclaimed Sora.

"It's huge!" yelled Donald.

"Gawrsh, ya shouldn't have, Aerith," said Goofy, blushing.

Aerith had led them to the newly renovated gummi garage.

"Why, thank you," Aerith said. "I made it myself."

"YOU DID!"

Aerith had apparently made a huge gummi ship.

"Yep," Aerith giggled. "Let me show you some features."

Aerith led the group around the ship.

"As you can see, this ship was spray painted black with an image of the Keyblade on the port and starboard. Here we have a fuel injected Holy-G engine, 4 Ultima-G lasers, 6 Firaga-G cannons, full body shields, Warp, Transform, and extra armor."

"Psst! Donald! What's she talkin' about?" Goofy whispered.

"I dunno…" Donald whispered. His voice then raised to a yell, "BUT SHE SAID LASERS! OH BOY!"

Aerith laughed. "I'm glad to see that you appreciate my handiwork, Donald. Come, let me show you the interior."

"Wow! Pretty!" exclaimed Sora.

"Hee hee…" Aerith giggled. "Thanks again."

The trio explored the ship to find the following things:

-Homegrown wines

-Persian rugs

-Endless supply of cheesecake

-4 floors

-Cable TV with all channels known to man-even BBC

-Leather furniture

-Stereo system with speakers all over the ship

-3 bedrooms with Tempur-Pedic mattresses

-3 bathrooms

-3 racing pods-which are for if Donald and Sora want to settle something with a race

-And more…If you cross the Real World house with the Hilton Hotel….you've got it.

"THANKS AERITH!" The three ran over and hugged her.

"Awww, why thank you," Aerith smiled.

"We'll be seeing you!" Sora exclaimed.

"'Kay!" Aerith said.

The engine started flaring and Sora, Donald, and Goofy jetted out into the darkness to find Leon and Yuffie.

**PLEASE R&R! Thanky.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disc: YAY! Chapter Three is finally here! (I'm excited. ) This chapter is the start of the humor in this story. Okay, good little readers, post some reviews! And eat apples. They keep doctors away. (Shudders at the word "doctor".) I don't own Kingdom Hearts. Also, I am in no way affiliated with **_Riverdance_.

- - -

"So, where to first?" Donald, who was piloting the ship, asked.

"Umm, uhh, uh, how about, um… my islands?" Sora stammered.

"I know why you wanna go there!" said Donald. "It's so you can see your precious Kair-"

"IT IS NOT!" Sora jumped up. He sat back down. "Okay, so what if it is?"

"Sora, this is an important mission, not a let's-go-make-out-with-hot-girls trip!"

Sora blushed. "I know, but…"

"You've gotta remember, we're looking for reinforcements."

"Who knows?"

Donald sighed. This kid was impossible. He paused. "….Alright, fine."

Sora jumped around the ship like a kangaroo-type-thing. "WHOOOPPPEEEEE!" He jumped up to Goofy's room. "Goofy, did you hear? We're going to the Destin…."

All Sora heard was, "Back, back, you mean ol' Heartless fellers! Ah hoo hoo hoo hooiee!"

"Heartless!" Sora exclaimed. "Hold on Goofy, I'm coming!"

Sora burst through the door…to find Goofy in front of the TV.

"Oh, hiya there, Sora!" Goofy said. He held out a video game contoller. "Wanna play Heartless Baser 500? That game's not even supposed to be out until Christmas! Uh hyuck."

Sora gave Goofy a puzzled look. Then he grinned. "'Kay! I'll play!"

Goofy looked overjoyed. "YAY! C'mon sit down right here!"

- - -

It was a long night for Donald. The Destiny Islands were in another galaxy, and as fast as this ship was, it would take all night to get there. Between the constant screaming of Sora and Goofy at their video game, and that there was nothing on the mini-TV in the cockpit except soap opera reruns, and the fact that he couldn't use the lasers to smash anything except rocks, since there were no enemy ships, and that he couldn't get up to go get something else to eat or drink besides stale coffee and cold pizza, the ship ride stunk on ice.

"This ship ride stinks on ice," Donald grumbled. "I wish there was something to eat." Suddenly, Donald's eyes fell onto the dashboard. Not literally.

"AN AUTOPILOT SWITCH!" yelled Donald. "NOW I CAN EAT!" Donald slammed his fist onto the autopilot switch. "WHEEEEEE! Time to eat!" screamed Donald.

Suddenly, he stopped. "HEY! Where's the conflabbed refrigerator at anyway?" He had only used to minifridge in the cockpit. "Aw, shucks. Time to search for the refrigerator." Donald used the cockpit's video communicator to connect to Goofy's room…

- - -

"Uh hyuck! I win again, Sora!" chortled Goofy.

Sora shouted some colorful language at the TV. Suddenly, Donald's face materialized on the room's plasma screen.

"We've got a situation on the cockpit level!" Donald yelled. "Come down and help me!"

Goofy and Sora were mystified.

"Wow! Donald…" Sora said.

"…You're on TV! Uh hyuck!" finished Goofy.

"Quit yammering!" ordered Donald. "Just get down here and help me!"

Sora nudged Goofy in the ribs. "That's one rude TV guy," he whispered.

"I know," Goofy whispered back. "But, uh, we should probably go downstairs to help."

"Yeah, you're right," said Sora. They both got into the elevator.

- - -

Sora and Goofy stepped out of the elevator to find Donald going ballistic. "Donald!" yelled Goofy. "You're not on the TV no more! Did your show get cancelled or somethin'?"

Sora huffed. "Serves him right, ordering all his viewers around like that."

"WILL YOU TWO JUST SHUT UP?" screamed Donald. "Now, you guys have gotta help me! I can't find the fridge!"

Sora thought for a minute about where fridges usually are. "Did you check the kitchen?"

Donald waddled slowly into the kitchen. He came rushing out, screaming, "IT'S NOT THERE! YAAAAAAAAAHHH!"

Goofy patted Donald on the back when he settled down. "It's okay, Donald," said Goofy reassuringly. "We'll find it soon, I guess."

"Yeah, it's not like it's just gonna pop out of the elevator!" said Sora.

"Gawrsh! Yeah, an' sprout legs an' arms an' eyes an' teeth!" Goofy joined in.

"Alexander, no!" said the TV in the cockpit.

"And be wearing a tutu!" laughed Sora.

"And doin' a _Riverdance_!" chuckled Goofy.

"And screaming it's name!"

Suddenly, the elevator dinged. Out jumped…the fridge. But it was no ordinary fridge. It was a fanged, legged,armed, eyed, tut wearing, talking, singing, _Riverdancing_ fridge!

"MY NAME IS PIGGER BOB FLUFF CHIVES DOLPHO RICK SANFORD III!" shrieked the fridge over and over. It tapped into the kitchen.

Sora, Donald and Goofy stood in place with their jaws to the floor.

"Ironic," said Donald weakly.

"What's that?" asked Goofy.

"Never mind…" sighed Donald.

"Should we go try to talk to it?" Sora asked.

"It's worth a try…" said Donald. The trio walked slowly into the kitchen…

- -

Sora and the others silently entered the kitchen. Goofy gently pushed Sora over to where they found the demented thing, which is at the stove, preparing pancakes.

"Ummm…" Sora began.

The fridge whirled around to face him. "GOOD MORNING!" it shrieked. "I was wondering when you'd get up. Come, sit at the table, Darla. I'll have breakfast ready in a minute."

Sora was baffled. "Uh, for starters, my name's Sora, not Darla."

The fridge burst into tears. "Oh, I keep forgetting I have new owners now!" The fridge just kept bawling…and bawling…and on occasion, sobbing.

Goofy walked over and patted the thing on its back. "It's okay. Now, can ya tell us some more about yerself?"

The fridge paused, then relaxed. "All right…" it said as the four strange….things…….sat down at the table.

- -

**Well, sorry if it wasn't that funny. Next chapter is funnier, I assure you. **

**COMING UP: **_We find out the fridge's gender!_

_Donald's head blows up!_

_Enter…a new character! Who is it?_

_What does the fridge think of when it thinks of flip flops?_

_**Also, a special appearance by Jessica Alba's head! **(I am not affiliated with her in any way. Humph, legal issues.)_

Please review! Oh yeah, Fluffy-kun…… you may have the ship if you can find it! Good look getting it out of Donald's hands though… 


	4. Chapter 4

Author's Note: Lock your sugar cabinets, and chain a bag of beets to your front door…KAMA-KUN IS BACK…AND HE'S HUNGRY, BABY! Anyhoo, kudos to FregandGord…(or rather, just Gord) and Nice reviews help me sleep at night. Still, it would be better if there were more…nudge nudge wink wink. So…I think this chapter is okay…let's see what you lot think.

**Disc: I do not own KH, unfortunately. If I did, there would be UMBRELLAS! LOADS OF 'EM! Also, I do not own The Gap, Cool Whip, or Angelina Jolie. Come to think of it…I don't own any _FLCL_ DVDs…I shall make a note to buy some.**

**- - - **

Sora: So, for starters, what's your name?

Fridge: My name is Pigger Bob Fluff Chives Dolpho Rick Sanford III. But you can call me Pigger Bob. Didn't you hear me in the last chapter as I _Riverdance_d into the kitchen?

Sora: Uh, no. And…just for the record, are you male or female?

Donald: SORAAA! That's a personal question! It could be both, ya know…

Pigger Bob: (Puts on a wig of straight blonde hair and applies lipstick.) I'm all woman. MWAH! (Makes kissy face.)

Sora: Ew, so you are both?

Pigger Bob: …….

Sora:…So, what are your interests?

Pigger Bob: Well, um, I like Guinea Pigs, wootbeer, smashed 'taters, alpacas, disco, disco dancing alpacas, long sleeved t-shirts from The Gap, trashy fanfics like this one, and complete and total randomness. But the list could get longer. Also, whenever I think of flip flops, I think of cuddly little puppies. Don't ask why.

Sora: Whaddaya mean trashy! The author slaved over a hot computer to write this!

(This is my cue. I enter the story right here, for a brief snippet of randomness.)

Kama-kun: Sora, I think I can speak for myself…

Pigger Bob: Wait a minute! Sora said "hot computer"! Can I meet him?

Kama-kun: If you're fond of Windows 98, then yeah, I guess. I'm so out of date… (Cue piano and spotlight.) Do-re-mi-fa-soooooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooOOOoOOOOOOoOOOOooOoOOoOoO… (Sings "Jack's Lament" from_ The Nightmare Before Christmas_.)

Pigger Bob: Oh, I forgot! Here's my little sister, Briette! (Pigger Bob opens her freezer door and out jumps a small toaster oven.)

Briette: ¡Hola! ¡Mi nombre es Briette! ¿Cómo usted es cabezas estúpida?

Donald: Um…yes?

Briette: (Insert colourful Spanish language here.)

Kama-kun: Hey, wait. Briette is a French name, right? So why is she speaking Spanish?

Briette: Kama, te quiero. Pero usted es tal cerebro de duh.

Goofy: Hey, you're the author! You're supposed to know.

Kama-kun: Hey, you're right.

(Everyone does a Mariachi dance and eats large amounts of Cool Whip. SUGARRRRRR.)

Kama-kun: Well, that was fun.

Donald: (with a lampshade on his head) You can say that again.

Kama-kun: Well, that was fun.

Sora: So, what do we do now?

Kama-kun: I have to go write it. See ya!

Everyone: 'Kay bye!

(Large rubber duckie pulls up out of nowhere.)

Kama-kun: (pats its head) Good Claudio! (I jump onto his back.) Giddyap! (Claudio gallops me back to outside my retarded computer.)

Sora: So, Pigger Bob, what do you dislike?

Pigger Bob: I am ascared of ferrets and squirrels and genetically enhanced chipmunks. (Jenna-san, that was for you! **snickers**)

Donald: That's a stupid fear.

Sora: Hey, the author is scared of the same thing! So is someone he knows.

Donald: There you go, defending the author again. He sucks!

Pigger Bob: Why, Donald, one of my interests is anger management. It would be my pleasure to work with you. (Hands him a business card.)

(Donald now throws a maelstrom of a tantrum.)

Briette: ¡Oye! ¡Cierre la boca, usted caballero picante!

Donald: YAAAAABLAHKSCHNUBBLAAAH! (His head changes pretty colours, then explodes.)

Sora: Don't worry, he does this all the time.

Goofy: I'm just gonna carry 'im over and sit 'im down in a chair. Sora, can ya get me one o' those replacement heads?

Sora: Sure thing, Goofy. (Takes the elevator to upstairs.)

Goofy: So, Pigger Bob, we're gonna be arrivin' at Sora's islands in about a half an hour. Are ya gonna come with us? I mean, do ya wanna get off the gummi ship?

Pigger Bob: Mmmm…can Briette come?

Goofy: Sure!

Briette: ¡IMPRESIONANTE! ¡YO CORAZON MENTECATO!

Goofy: Aw, shucks…

Pigger Bob: And…can I get a killer tan?

Goofy: The Destiny Islands provide the best tan anywhere!

Pigger Bob: Groovy!

Briette: No ser grosero, Pigger Corta, pero usted es ni capaz de obtener un bronceado o a un hippi.

(Sora comes out of the elevator.)

Sora: Hey, Donald! I got you a new head!

Headless Donald: (Claps hands.)

Sora: (runs over and attaches head, then steps back) Well, what do you think.

Goofy: (stares) It looks like Jessica Alba.

Sora: That's because IT IS! Let's face it, Donald was ugly before. Now, he's hot!

Pigger Bob: So, you're both too?

Jessica/Donald: I'M HOTTTT!

Goofy: So, why's Jessica Alba's head on Donald's body?

Sora: All of Donald's replacement heads were gone, so I called Jessica and asked her for one of hers!

Briette: Difícil.

Jessica/Donald: Well, until we can get another head for me, can I be headless? I don't feel comfortable being this hot all at once.

Sora: Okay… (unscrews head) Okay, you're headless again!

Headless Donald: (claps)

Goofy: WE'RE AT THE ISLANDS, I RECKON!

Sora: (does a can-can) Let's go!

- - -

Wanna know what Briette is saying? You'll find out soon, my little kiddies.

**Coming Up: Sora and Kairi are reunited!**

**Kairi has a sister!**

**And…some unexpected visitors, some being my neighbors!**


End file.
